Do We Place Our Hearts In The Right Hands?

A question that I ask myself so often is: Is the person I chose to give my heart to even worthy of it? I know that many of you would answer that if I am even asking this question then my answer should be obvious, but it's not. Right now I am going through a very difficult time in my relationship and I just can't seem to get my head around it. I have fallen inlove, no...deeply inlove with someone and he is breaking my heart. The worst part is is that I have no one to talk to about this because I don't want anyone to hate him. As I am typing this now I am sobbing quietly so that my mother wont hear me. Do you know what the loudest noise that I have ever heard is? It is my heart breaking and the silent tears that I am crying. I haven't eaten all day except for my nails and I must have smoked a pack of cigarettes tonight. What a mess! My problem is that I feel that whenever my boyfriend and I fight it seems so easy for him to leave me. What ever happened to saying I love you to some one and actually meening it? I feel that it is just a word that he uses but does not understand its depth. When someone says I love you doesn't that stand for anything? Shouldn't you stand by the person you love and try to work things out? I know that every body is replaceable but I never thought that love was. Maybe it's not love that he feels for me because if this is love then I really don't have much to look forward to. The thing is that we rarely fight but when we do it is earth shattering and it seems that I am the only one that gets hurt. Have I fallen inlove alone? I feel that I have. You don't only show some one that you love them through the good times, it is through the bad times when you see what you really meen to a person. As for the question above: Do we place our hearts in the right hands? Some do, but I didn't.